We’ve been at this awhile—six years, to be exact. That’s six years worth of issues, six years of submissions, six years of ever-changing staff. Now what horrors, exactly, have the submission box witnessed in this great span of time? The measures the Loco Team takes to put out good quality content are unparalleled— but the submission and editing process isn’t always spic and span. Welcome to the dark room, the behind the scenes exclusivity of the Loco Submittable. Oh, submission box, what secrets do you hide?

Watch us expose ourselves: take a look at some of our proudest—and darkest—moments below. Yes, we too write cover letters—sometimes.

  1. It wasn’t broken:

  1. Elitist white dudes:

  1. Way too straight:

  1. Save them:

  1. Hi Kirby:

  1. The cover letter that makes you do a double take:

  1. Apologetic and confused:

  1. Okay Helen but me too, the revelation that changed everything:

  1. Exposing Paul:

  1. Paul, who just doesn’t know for sure:

  1. The casual roast:

  1. When Helen has absolutely no chill (OH MY GOD I’M LAUGHING OUT LOUD)—but when it comes to Steve Harrington, we’ve all been there:

  1. The cover letter that is all of us:

  1. Didn’t he always?:

  1. Even the Loco team struggles with fitting the theme:

  1. Aaaaand again:

  1. When even time constraints can’t stop you:

  1. When Paul has invented a new religion:

  1. Poor Mark:

  1. We all have lazy, Red Bull-fueled days (or nights):

Notable quotes by person:

Lana Valente: “HEY GUYS WHAT’S GOOD,” “I have no idea what’s going on,” “hey kirby,” “I am so sorry”

Helen Armstrong: “I wanted to fuck Steve Harrington,” “lolz Kevin Spacey sucks now,” “way too straight for me,” “abortion pirates”

Paul Ippolito: “ayyy kirby stay safe baybay,” “god is dead and i am the new deity,” “ugh”

Eric McInnis: “Family Guy is a rip off”

We hope you enjoyed this super exclusive peek into the cover letters behind the artwork; we’re a mess, and we embrace it.

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