Those Drunken Talks

Drinking stories

Everyone has had those drunken moments when you pour your heart out or go off on someone. Whether it be something ridiculous or something hilarious you still have a great time. Question is do you ever fully remember those nights? Do you ever remember the full conversation or just bits and pieces? Here are a couple of conversations I had with a couple of drunken friends (I was sober, of course) and asked them a couple of goofy questions.

Rudy Checo: How’s going?
Sid: It’s going great man!! I’m having a fucking blast!
RC: Ha-ha that’s good man. How you feeling?
Sid: I’m feeling good. (Girl passes by him and gives him “the eye”) Damn girl let me get your number!?
RC: I see you enjoying the ladies. Should go dance with her.
Sid: (goes over and starts twerking on girl) Ima teach you how to dance girl! (Girl’s facial expression is “WTF is he doing?!” and also laughing)
RC: (Still watching) Hey Sid, it looks like your Jersey turnpiking this poor girl, I don’t think she can handle it.
Sid: (while twerking) My ass is too bodacious for her to handle. (Nelly’s “Hot in Here” starts playing) This is my song!! Hot in!! So Hot in HERE! (Starts taking off his shirt and twirls it in the air) I WAS LIKE GOOD GRACIOUS ASS BODACIOUS!! TURN UP SEASON!!
RC: (Slowly walking away as to avoid the craziness) At least he had a good time.

There was another night I encountered this drunken guy when I was on my way back to my apartment. He was staring at this tree for a good amount time. So I decided to walk to my apartment and get settled in but while I’m sitting there playing my call of duty ghosts I hear this guy singing. So I step outside my balcony and he is singing to the tree the One Direction song called “What Makes You Beautiful”. I was laughing so hard, but then I decided to play along. So I brought my speakers outside my balcony and started playing that exact song. He got so surprised and excited. He started singing along. While the song was playing he looks up to the sky and says “Your beautiful too Jesus!!” This had me dying on the floor. I had responded by saying, “You’re welcome, son!” He then proceeded to hug the tree and then eventually he just fell asleep. I don’t know where he ended up after that but the next morning and he wasn’t there, but by my standards he had an awesome night.

This last and final moment throughout this awesome experience of finding out how people’s drunken nights go, there is this one in particular that really seems to get to me. I was at a bar with my cousins and the owner of the bar decided he wanted to mess around with all the drunks. (Mind you, I’m one of them). He had painted a fake door on the wall in the back of the bar. Now some of these guys, believe it or not, were so drunk they actually believed it was a real door. (Including me. Yes I was plastered). So this is how it goes…

Manager: If anyone here can open this door they won’t have to pay for any of their drinks!
My Cousin: Hey but that door…
Manager: Shhh man! Just wait and watch.
(All these drunks start heading toward the door trying really hard to open this well painted fake door on the wall)
Drunk 1: Hey man why won’t this thing open!
Drunk 2: Here you need some elbow grease!
Drunk 3: Let me open it!
(Mean while I’m sitting with my cousin, watching all these guys trying to open this fake door.) (So I was told…)

The manager comes over and says to me…

Manager: Why aren’t you trying to open the door man?
My Cousin: Yeah, bro because this is a lot of drinks I have to pay for.
Me: Shhh… don’t tell anyone, but I have the key.
My cousin starts dying in laughter and falls to the floor.
Meanwhile the manager is laughing and says to my cousin the drinks are on the house!
We didn’t have to pay for any drinks that night it was literally the best birthday a guy could ask for.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *