In the early 1920’s the proud nation of Australia was pitted against a most dangerous foe. It was around the year 1932 when a great drought besieged the land. While the many natives were able to survive during these harsh times, the nation’s populace of emu were drawn inward towards more and more human settlements in search of food. Emus are nothing but the Devil’s breed of avian type, hard to kill and even harder to appease. They say seeing one up close is staring into the very Devil’s eyes.
Early October days see many Australian farmers driven off their farms by hungry, ravenous emu birds. At times, even the humans were consumed; those unfortunate enough to be slow to react to the onslaught. It wasn’t very long until the emus had become the superior species in the ever-changing Australian food chain. Man had once again been humbled by the wrath of nature and pestilence. Even so, man’s arrogance and stubborn-born qualities transcend horror itself.
In late October, a royal Australian artillery detachment is dispatched. These brave soldiers of the down under were armed to the teeth with machine guns sporting approximately 10,000 ammunition rounds. Their mission was clear; to take back the farm settlements from the devilish emus by any means necessary and so began the war upon nature itself.
The first battle of the Great Emu War occurred on October 31st. It was postponed due to rainy weather.
On November 1st there is little success with the detachment’s attacks. The emus prove more cunning with their agility, durability, and blind panic. Bullets merely splash off their thick hides. On November 2nd, more than 1,000 emus escape a human ambush; during which the soldiers were reloading their machine guns. Fewer than 12 emus are reported to be killed.
On November 4th, bigger guns were brought in. Guns mounted by moving vehicles were meant to mow down the emu forces with ease. This tactic is quickly abandoned when emus begin to ram themselves through the steering wheels. On November 5th, it is discovered the emus each have packs; these subsequent packs are led by dominant emus.
It is only on November 8th that Australian Parliament decides to end the war and spend their time on other, more practical endeavors. Such as trying to contract spider peace between civilian and arachnid. As a result, the war was officially closed on November 9th, Australia declaring defeat and just letting the emus keep the damn farm land.
Nothing ever grew there anyway.
