I Want to Believe: ‘Beatle’juice

Paul, we used to sing with you. We used to sing.

– Heard when backmasking The Beatles’ “Real Love”

Even a casual listener of The Beatles is at least vaguely aware of the decades of history surrounding the group. There exists a prominence in the their past, their record-breaking albums, cult following, and societal impact. The “Beatlemania” of the 60s was a thing, you know.

They’ve left a permanent impact on the music industry, forever changing how later artists were and are perceived. It’s a monopoly of sorts that created an expectation for new bands based around old bands. There’s always the title of “the next Beatles.” Case in point: they’re a reference point for greatness. Everyone knows The Beatles. But do they really?

How much does the public truly know about the world-famous musical group? They know what has been filtered to them through record labels and interviews, and in today’s age, they know what Google tells them. People tend to suck up what a news source reports without fact-checking, and what they don’t realize is that some of the shared information — more than some, probably, we live in an era of fake news — might not be true.

For example, according to most mainstream sources (read: Google, Wikipedia, other liars), The Beatles’ Paul McCartney is alive. They’re wrong.

Before you click the ‘x’ on your tab, hear me out.

The rumor has been described as both “outlandish” and “extreme,” but what if there’s some truth in it? The public, or super fans in particular, have a way of weeding out information that would otherwise slip under the radar. This isn’t some obscurist theory designed to throw Paul McCartney’s life into a spiral (if that is his real name). It’s a complex hypothesis with a surprising amount of evidence to back it up, if you’re willing to study the symbolism and hidden clues.

That said, if he really is Paul… Sorry, man. But if he isn’t, well… I don’t feel too bad about theorizing, because the case we have here is downright strange. You heard it here first, folks: if you’re not questioning by the end of this article, then I’ve failed.

Paul McCartney was born in 1942 in Liverpool, United Kingdom. In 1960, he and three other men formed the famous band we know and love: the lineup was McCartney himself, John Lennon, George Harrison, and Ringo Starr. They rose to popularity in 1962 under their first studio contract, and the rest is history.

The band began its “golden jubilee” of fame and fortune as their careers took off, but soon after the release of Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band, they were in the news for other reasons. The “Paul is dead” conspiracy cropped up in 1969 following a phone call to Detroit’s WKNR-FM radio station by college student Tim Harper. The working DJ at the time, Russ Gibb, listened as Harper described a series of clues supporting the theory that Paul McCartney was actually dead.

This theory was an echo of old rumors from London in 1967, but with the talk on US radio, the conspiracy gained traction. The story began with a car crash, and grew into one of the most complex and well-known Hollywood conspiracies to date.

The popular theory suggested that McCartney had gotten into an argument with his bandmates. He left Abbey Road studios in a fury at 5 a.m. on November 9, 1966. Supposedly, McCartney then crashed his Aston Martin, resulting in a horrifying accident. He was decapitated behind the wheel.

Theorists go on to say that it was covered up, because the loss of a member during the peak of their career would spell the end of The Beatles and a devastating loss for the fan base. The idea arose to bribe police and journalists to prevent the story from being released, and the band would replace Paul with the public being none the wiser. Enter William Shears Campbell — or “Faul,” as some dedicated conspiracy theorists refer to him, which is fucking hysterical. According to the theory, Billy Shears was the winner of a Paul McCartney lookalike contest that was held in 1965.

Fans say that he underwent surgery to perfect McCartney’s look, and the surgical procedures are the reason why he grew facial hair circa the production of Sgt. Pepper’s, compared to the rest of his relatively “beard-free” career. However, despite the operation, the two still had different face shapes.

Believers also suggest that Paul’s death is the reason why The Beatles stopped touring in 1966, and the rest of the band wasn’t completely on board with an imposter as a substitute. Having been enticed into silence, the original three Beatles used their future albums to hint at McCartney’s passing. The first of the clues is Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band, which was released in the spring of 1967.

This album cover — which won a Grammy, nice — is said to hold secrets about the truth behind McCartney’s death. Theorists studied it at length, and claim that there are hints in the tiniest of designs on the front and the back.

McCartney’s positioning — standing as the odd one out — brought about questions from fans who were curious as to why he was depicted as a singular entity, separate from the group. Eyebrows were further raised by the front cover, which depicted a difference in instruments, making McCartney different from the others. He carries a cor anglais, a black woodwind instrument, compared to the brass ones of the other band members.

Believers also cite an open palm above McCartney’s head, which could be interpreted as a blessing from a priest before internment. At the side, near the decidedly creepy doll wearing a “Welcome the Rolling Stones” sweater, there’s a driving glove. It’s reddish (or bloody according to some), meant to represent McCartney’s bloody death behind the wheel.

In the middle, the drum kit announces the name of the album. If you hold a mirror over the “Lonely Hearts,” it reads “I ONE IX HE DIE,” which fans took to understand as 11/9, the day of McCartney’s supposed passing. At their feet, there’s a flower bass guitar, which is coincidentally McCartney’s main instrument. It only has three strings, a symbol for the dead McCartney being “the missing string.”

Also, to be honest, it looks like a grave — and it’s supposed to. Mainstream fans (read: non-believers) say that The Beatles were trying to represent an end for their earlier era as they ushered in a new brand for themselves and their music. While their music has definitely changed over the years, what if it wasn’t just because of a “new era”? What if there was another reason?

The second largest part of the “Paul is dead” theory is borne from Abbey Road.

This image would spur Instagram models and recreations for decades to come, and it has since become an iconic cover. Theorists view this album as one of the most obvious hints towards Paul’s demise because it looks like a funeral procession. From right to left, it can be seen as the priest, the undertaker, the corpse, and the gravedigger.

John Lennon leads in white, the holy man, followed by Ringo Starr in black. Paul McCartney follows, out of step with the rest of the band, and his suit and lack of shoes — as people are often buried without them for convenience’s sake — presents itself as a representation of the corpse. George Harrison in casual denim reads as the working digger (where’s his shovel?) to theorists.

A Volkswagen Beetle can be seen in the background, using a license plate labeled “28IF.” The more hardcore of the believers interpreted this as a message that if McCartney had lived, he would have been 28 years old. If he had.

The theory broadens as countless more analyses, including the Magical Mystery Tour album cover and the White Album poster sleeve. The White Album poster in particular featured an image of the man fans believed to be Billy Shears, or the “new” Paul McCartney.

The other featured image of the man in the bathtub was an alleged “autopsy photo” taken of Paul after his death. This is… clearly false, because while bodies are bathed postmortem, there’s certainly no need for a bubble bath. This one I will concede to be a total reach and also blatantly false, but my fellow conspirators can have their fun.

Finally, one of the greatest pieces of the “Paul is dead” puzzle is The Beatles’ practice of backmasking and slipping hidden statements in their songs. The process of backmasking is done by playing a record backward; supposedly when you play a variety of Beatles’ records in reverse, you’ll hear a lot more than you bargained for.

Among the most popular quotes are, “Turn me on, dead man,” heard backwards in “Revolution 9,” “Paul took the wrong road,” in “Glass Onion,” “Paul is dead,” in “Birthday,” and “He never wore his shoes, we all know he was dead,” in “It’s Johnny’s Birthday.”

Remember Abbey Road? Yeah, full circle baby.

The most famous quote of all is arguably from Lennon himself, when he garbles some gibberish at the end of “I’m So Tired.” In reverse, it sounds like “Paul is a dead man, miss him! Miss him! Miss him!”

While all of these are circumstantial at best (as well as a matter of opinion and hearing range), what led fans to believe in them so wholeheartedly was the fact that The Beatles were known to backmask in the past, for the sake of hiding little phrases. There’s a hidden swear in “Hey Jude,” supposedly when McCartney made a mistake that was left in the final mix. It’s also seen in “Girl” from Rubber Soul, in which McCartney and Lennon repeatedly sing “dit, dit, dit,” which, by McCartney’s own admission, was “tit,” as a funny sort of innuendo.

Hilarious, Paul. Really a knee-slapper. The point is, they have a track record for hiding things. Who’s to say they wouldn’t drop hints about, I don’t know, the death of a band member? In the grand scheme of things, it’s not that far-fetched.

The miraculous thing about “Paul is dead,” is its age and potency — within the last fifteen years, there are still updated reports discussing the concept, because the theory just won’t die. A paternity case from 1984 made waves again in 2007, after a woman claiming that McCartney is her father said that he had used a stand-in for the blood test.

Bettina Krischbin went on record in the 80s saying that she was the daughter of the British musician. Krischbin says that her mother, Erika Hübers, shared a romantic tryst with McCartney between 1959 and 1962, and that she was the result of an affair.

Krischbin went on to claim that she discovered evidence of the affair in her mother’s old letters and personal diaries. McCartney asserted that he does not remember ever encountering Ms. Hübers, but in 1966 paid to settle a child maintenance claim from her. This agreement did not admit paternity, and the musician says he only agreed because he was threatened to be grounded from touring with the band if the dispute went unresolved.

Ever since the case arose, McCartney has denied being Krischbin’s father. After he undertook a blood test and it was proven negative, her claim was dismissed by the court. However, just as recently as 2007, Krischbin asked for her case to be revisited. She said that McCartney had sent a body double in to submit the blood sample, and that his signature was fake.

The signature on the documents he signed at the time was false. We found the signature is from a right-handed person and he is not. I want a new paternity test.

– Bettina Krischbin… McCartney?

Unfortunately for her, when she requested the case be reopened, she was denied. The prosecutor’s office took a look at the 1984 file and had decided that the “alleged incident” had simply happened too long ago.

“Even if the criminal offence which it is claimed was committed was in fact committed,” said the prosecutor on Krischbin’s case, “the statute of limitations has now expired.”

The case was dropped, and Krischbin is probably pretty pissed off to this day. I mean, I don’t get a Michael Jackson’s Billie Jean vibe from this, so can you blame her? What’s the big idea with bringing in a body double? Rock stars pop out kids all the time, and Krischbin has stated on record that she doesn’t want an inheritance. She just wants the truth.

(The real Paul’s dead, guys. That’s why he sent in a double.)

In spite of all of this — rumored death, love children — McCartney has continued to thrive under his legacy and his continued work in the music industry and elsewhere. He’s credited with being part of one of the most influential musical groups of all time, and recently released a solo album in 2018, entitled Egypt Station. He’s also an animal rights activist, so he’s a pretty cool dude.

Listen, I’m not saying he’s a bad guy; I’m just saying he might not be who we think he is. Whatever the case, if they ever come out with the truth — or a DNA test, maybe — I, for one, cannot wait to say:

. . .

References:

Biography.com Editors. “Paul McCartney.” Biography.com, A&E Networks Television, 5 July 2018, www.biography.com/people/paul-mccartney-9390850.

Polidoro, Massimo. “A Myth That Rocks: The Premature Death of Paul McCartney.” LiveScience, Purch, 20 Dec. 2005, www.livescience.com/4000-myth-rocks-premature-death-paul-mccartney.html.

Sirius XM Writers. “Paul is dead: The Ongoing Conspiracy of ‘Faul’ McCartney Ignited on October 12, 1969.” Hear & Now, 18 Nov. 2015, blog.siriusxm.com/paul-is-dead-the-ongoing-conspiracy-of-faul-mccartney-ignited-on-october-12 -1969/.

Hopper, Tristin. “’I Buried Paul’: Your Guide to the Convoluted Conspiracy Theory That Paul McCartney Died in 1966.” National Post, 29 Mar. 2018, nationalpost.com/news/world/i-buried-paul-your-guide-to-the-convoluted-conspiracy-that-paul-m ccartney-died-in-1966.

Foster, Tina. “‘Paul McCartney’s’ Stand-in Gave Blood in Paternity Case.” Plastic Macca — Paul Is Dead, 1 Jan. 1970, plasticmacca.blogspot.com/2009/09/pauls-stand-in-gave-blood-in-paternity.html.

Connolly, Kate. “McCartney Paternity Inquiry Dropped.” The Guardian, Guardian News and Media, 25 May 2007, www.theguardian.com/world/2007/may/26/germany.kateconnolly.

de Quetteville, Harry. “McCartney Fraud Charge over ‘Love Child’.” The Telegraph, Telegraph Media Group, 19 May 2007, www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/1552030/McCartney-fraud-charge-over-love-child.html.

Shivani, Anis. “Culture: Paul Is Dead: The Conspiracy Theory That Won’t Go Away.” DAWN.COM, 15 Jan. 2017, www.dawn.com/news/1307942.

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Featured image credit: Bartek Miskiewicz, Penny Lane via photopin (license)