ever since i was a little kid, ive always had a hard time speaking and writing. not sure why, but i chalk it up to two things – one, my mishapen mouth, and two, my adhd. Rhe combination of my motor mouth with teeth in the way and my hyper speed brain has always lead to mispeakings and funny moments, but also some rather embarassing ones. My typing is a whole other story (dsylexia and too fast fingers can lead to many a mistake) – but for now, let me tell you a few tales of the horrors of my motor mouth.
the earliest memories i have of a mispeak is the word gully. You see, when i was younger my mouth was seriously deformed. i had an overbight, the roof of my mouth was messed up, and most of my teeth were either missing or very crooked. I could not speak for the life of me, so one day, when i was in the car and my mom and i were talking, i let a fat one slip. I had been desprately trying to say “gully”, as in the type of property formation at the back of your yard, but i failed misserably. the word that exited my mouth sounded more like “galley”, sending my mother into a laughing fit that lasted easily five minutes. and that folks, is just the start.
besides mispeaking words, i also have the nasty combination of combining words together at random moments and instances. theres really no rhym or reason to this one, but it just tends to happen a lot. the most recent one i can remember is when i was playing games with some friends online, it being rather late and all of us rather loopy from exhaustion. we had been playing a horror game on roblox (silly i know), when i noticed something behind one of my friends character. Of course i was going to call this out to try and save his life, but what ended up coming out of my mouth was not what i wanted to say. Originally, i had ttried to say “Blaine, behind you!”. however, what came out sounded more like “Bayndyou!”. my stupid mouth had combined every single word in that sentence into one, which ended up having the complete opposite effect of what I wanted it to have. intead of noticing the monster behind him, my friend ended up losing it laughing, all of us laughing along with him, and unfortunately dying to the monster that had been stalking us.
besides being rather embarrassing, i will admit it was funny in its own right. instances like this have happened before, resulting in creating words that ive used on daily basises. i think a few of my favorites thus far have been “hoopop” (who popped), “moormie” (move over to me), “kipper” (keep her), and many more. my mispeaking has honestly been a huge part of my life, but one last thing id like to mention is misplelling. because of my adhd, i have a hard time typing or writing. for the article as a jpke, i turned off auto correct just to see how many mistakes i truly make. As you can see, its a lot. I’m honestly a little embarrassed, but that’s okay. It can be abit of a struggle sometimes, but my mispeakings and spellings can honestly make for a lot of fun. I hope youve all had fun reading them as well. Till next time.
Feature Image Credit To Anna Stevens
